Transition

transition

I haven’t been here lately. Trust me when I say that it’s not you, it’s me.

We are moving and while I am happy for new beginnings, I am also sad to be leaving familiar faces and the security of what I know. I’m struggling to find a balance between being actively in the present while at the same time planning for the future. House hunting has been stressful, although extremely exciting. And saying goodbye is always scary for me… the military brat in me is screaming.

Take all of that and factor in a bit of identity crisis and you’re pretty much where I am right now.

transition

In some ways, my life has never felt so certain. I have found the most wonderful person to share my life with. My relationships with my family have found their way to the top of the list. And all around me I feel a giant hug of love and support. Personally, I am fully satisfied and have a very clear picture of who I am and what I believe in. Professionally is another story.

I find myself wishing for simpler times, when gender roles were well-defined and the freedom of being able to choose from a million careers didn’t feel so vast. Maybe I was born in the wrong decade – all I want to do is cook, clean, garden and sew. Is that so bad? CRIMES AGAINST FEMINISM!?!

In a lot of ways, it feels like I’m throwing away all that was fought for me.

Ungrateful. Lazy.

And while I know that I’m neither of those things, I don’t feel quite right about all of it either…

So right now, instead of trying to figure all of that out I am trying to focus on the things that I know for sure. I know that I am moving and I know that I will soon have to say goodbye.

That’s enough for now… the rest will all sort itself out in time.

About these ads

12 thoughts on “Transition

  1. Oh how familiar it all sounds – different generations I know, but still the same emotions and thoughts! Things do sort themselves out eventually, but knowing that you are with the person you want to be with is a HUGE plus and totally at the top of a list of things to achieve!!! It’s not good-bye but au revoir, with communication being what it is these days. And, as for happily being at home, cooking, etc etc – NO SHAME please!! Gender roles will go on being debated, worried over, etc for generations to come. We don’t all have to have careers that mean the rest of our life takes a back seat – You know what is important to You, and at the moment, and what makes you happy, so you’re right, it’s concentrating on what is happening right now – the rest will sort itself out in time – now, where have I heard that before? :-) xxxxx and hugs

  2. wow Lindsay… what a post. I was just thinking of you last night and thought, I should really get together with her and chat about things over tea and a meal. But now you’re leaving! sigh. I’ll be in touch to figure out if you might have an hour to spare before your departure… Otherwise, all I can do is tell you that boy, do I ever identify with what you’ve written here, and that I am cheering for you and hope all will work out in the end. Que sera, sera… Your foundation of family and friends (and Rob!) supporting you will get you through it all. Bon voyage et bonne chance! xox

    • awww! thank you, camille. i have been a hermit these past few weeks/months… very anti-social and i feel bad for not having contacted you to get together. but lets do try to do so before we leave… : )

  3. I hear you loud and clear. And I think for some (myself included) part of the self will always be trying new things out as opposed to “settling down” to one career. And let me say that while it isn’t so great on the stability front, the quality of life is totally there….because you get to live it instead of sitting behind a desk watching it.
    And I for one am glad to have made your acquaintance before our paths would most likely not have crossed.
    see you soon – our salute to simpler times – ladies and knitting needles and coffee/treats.

    • Wise words from the Child Whisperer! : )

      Karen, you are one of my idols! I am so glad to have met you, too! I am very excited for our salute tonight… sounds wonderful. ps. I may have to eat a whole date square to myself ; )

  4. Lindsey, all you can do is be the best person you can be and right now I think you are pretty darn incredible. Wanting to stay home, clean, garden, cook, etc. is not a bad thing! Maybe you can do both – have a home based career and do the other things you love. In any case, don`t change who you are – I love you that way.

  5. I’m a little behind on my blog reading. this is a great post. Moving is always an emotional time. Count yourself lucky it sounds like you have found a great partner to share this adventure with. Can’t wait to see the renos posted here. And don’t feel bad for wanting to be at home cooking and sewing…sometimes I wish we lived in those simpler times too.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s